That's probably a pretty common title up there, but I'm not working on much sleep, so I don't care.
I live in Seattle but I grew up in the Bay Area in a little town you've only heard of mentioned as a throwaway line in movies about the world blowing up or in that one movie with Johnny Depp where he gets shot with radiation and his wife has abandonment issues so she uploads him to a computer and lets him turn himself into a weird T-1001 (kind of liquid metal, but also air metal and people metal. That's the next stage of Terminators, or would have been if John Connor hadn't kicked their asses before they could develop air metal. I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm so sleepy.). This smallish town was close enough to San Francisco that I could have driven out that way to see it, but also close enough that I didn't really care enough to go visit. "Oh, it's right there. I could do any time."
My friend who grew up in a podunk town in Ohio had never been, though, so when my boss offered me three days off last week I decided Friend and I should take a spontaneous road trip down to CA to check out SF for the changing of the year. He and I both really like to walk and explore and see any and all new things, so we were pretty excited to get to go. For me, it was nearly my first time in SF and for him it was actually his first time in SF. My parents own a wine tasting business that uses tourism as a thin veil to cover the fact that they really just like drinking with strangers and sailing by Alcatraz going, "wooooooo!" because I would guess that's what you do when you're drunk and you drive a boat past Alcatraz. I wasn't drunk when we got a private tour of the bay, so I didn't go, "wooooo!" but I did go, "ack!" when we hit a big wave and I got a face full of seawater.
I had a point about tourists? Oh, I was the tourist. So, Friend and I drove the 13 hours down to SF and stayed at my mom's place and ran my feet ragged because I can't seem to find decent shoes ever. We climbed the hill and stairs to Coit Tower and got a private tour of a building I'm not allowed to mention we were up in, but we got to go to the very top and stand in the highest point in SF and look out some cloudy windows over the city. We fought our way through hordes of people watching the fireworks by the Ferry Building on the Embarcadero, we ate some really amazing vegan food, we watched a baby get hit in the face by the door of a bus, and we had a bitchy dude loudly inform us he was "from Manhattan!" as if his shitty attitude wasn't enough of a tell. It was fun.
When I came home, my cats weren't super thrilled to see me. They were super thrilled to investigate my backpack after I emptied it of dirty clothes, but me they were like, "eh. We could take you or leave you. You're no empty backpack."
I should start saying that to people who displease me. "Eh. You're no empty backpack."