March Rundown

March was a bust! Blurgh. I failed in everything except getting enough sleep, which was mostly because I was too tired to do much else. I had to be at work almost every day, which made my asthma and allergies really bad, which knocked me out. I'm not sure if my weight stagnation was due to stress or just laziness or what, but I wasn't having ANY weight loss for awhile so I basically gave up. I'm pretty unhappy with myself.

As of today, April 2, I weight 156, which is 7lbs heavier than I weight at the start of March, which makes me feel really shitty. I'm having a pretty hard time with my stupid failure to keep myself in check, honestly. I'd been doing pretty well in January, and even mostly in February, and then I just shot myself in the foot.

It's harder still because I'm spending a full two weeks in Europe for my birthday later this month, and I know I'll come out of that trip heavier just because there's so much good food I want to try all over Austria, Germany, and Prague. It's harder, emotionally, to look at the prospect of keeping myself in check before that because I have a tendency to go, "Well, I can't get all the way there I want to be, so I won't try at all."

But, until then, I'm gonna stick to fasting, stick below my calorie limit, and do my best to go into the trip NOT heavier than I am now, so that I don't undo even more of my weight loss that I had managed through the start of 2018.

Good: I got enough sleep, I managed my German lessons every day (I'm at a 90 day streak!), I wrote or edited ✏️ most days of the month, and fasted pretty consistently. Bad: Everything else!

 I briefly toyed with upping my calorie budget to 1500 because I thought I was doing well enough, but at the end of a few days, I knew it was a bad idea, so I lowered it again to 1350. NOW! That's actually what LoseIt said I should eat PLUS 100 calories that I added on because 1250 seems like a hard thing to stick to. Really, though, with fasting, I'm just being greedy wanting more calories. I can stick to 1250, I just need to up my will power. That's another issue I had this month: Willpower. I was hungry ALL MONTH. Fasting was a chore, much worse than usual. I don't know what's up with my body's cycle, but March was just tough on me all around.

I am pretty proud of how well I did at getting a decent amount of sleep, but it was less a choice I made, like I said, and more just be being too beat to do much other than be in bed.

Ugh. I don't even want to look at this.

I did do well at writing, though. I rushed through the end of Veruca and Finn's final book, Knell, and then worked on the third part of the romance trilogy that Amber Morgan and I co-wrote. That's been submitted, and I spent the last half of the month editing Knell to ready it to be submitted. Now I just need to write the blurb and submit that too, which I hope to get done some time this week.

Well, that was March! I made some good OT money (though, it doesn't count, as it has to go right back into my POS car that I hate that seems to need HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS worth of work every few months because Fiat is a shit brand of car), felt like dying most of the month because I couldn't breathe, finished two of my writing to-dos, and gained a crap-ton of weight.

Hopefully April is better!